Mama J on October 30th, 2008

When Amy was about three or four (she’s now nine) I thought of
starting a website called Mama Jo’s Travel Tips.  I had a fantasy that
Amy and I would travel the country and post reviews on the activities
we did and the places we stayed. 
Of course, that would have required unlimited time and budget, or at
least would [...]

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Mama J on October 29th, 2008

I think I picked up this term, zigzag evolution, from Patricia
Papernow’s foundational book, Becoming a Stepfamily.  The meat of
this concept is that stepfamilies do not evolve in a straight, predictable,
line.  Rather, they zigzag, more along the lines of the one-step-
forward, two-steps-back analogy. 
While it’s true that all families zigzag to some extent, stepfamilies
typically have more obstacles [...]

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Don’t fret. Your college girls will search once more for connectedness
and roots. They just need a little time to spread their wings.
Even if you daughter never actually said, “I can’t wait to get out of this
house!” she probably thought it once or twice during the high school
years.  And unless she’s either not attending college or [...]

Continue reading about Your Girl’s Away at College? Don’t Worry, She’ll be Back….

Mama J on October 23rd, 2008

If we ride gracefully away from the election battlefield to view the
election from a higher hilltop, we may realize what an opportunity any
presidential election presents for the young women in our lives.
It’s an exciting time, one that provokes a lot of questions about who is
voting for whom and why.  Elementary and middle-school kids will
likely side [...]

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Mama J on October 22nd, 2008

Your Turn:  Where do you turn when stepfamily dynamics have you in
a mood?
 “…this angst brings me to what I call my ’swing point:’ the point at
which my thoughts and feelings cross to the dark side.” 
As much as I try to stay positive, every once in a while I go into a bit
of a funk about [...]

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Mama J on October 21st, 2008

I went horseback riding this weekend, catching what is possibly the last
of the blazing gold aspen on our Northern Colorado ridges before the
trees turn and the snow starts to fall.  On the ride, I enjoyed the
company of several teenagers, all of whom fell into a respectful silence
as we journeyed across meadows and through the woods. 
A respectful silence?  [...]

Continue reading about How Different are International Teens?

Mama J on October 16th, 2008

Today I want to share with you two great resources to aid your
parenting or stepparenting efforts.
First, check out this organization I’ve just learned about called
The Mother Daughter Project:  a community of women and girls
dedicated to discovering and sharing ways mothers and daughters can
stay close and thrive together through adolescence and beyond. The
small group settings recommended [...]

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Mama J on October 15th, 2008

I like to think of myself as a compassionate person, but sometimes my
compassion allowance runs low.  I become too tired or too wrapped up
in my own work and life issues to show compassion to my kids.  That’s
when I lose sight of what I call “the good.”
Before my stepchildren became young adults, we lived together full
time.  [...]

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Mama J on October 14th, 2008

In rare form today, I’m stating my conclusion first:
I don’t think there is any one right time or age for your daughter to
get the first holes in her precious earlobes.  However, these
considerations and stories might help you make or refine your plan
about what is probably the most common request from daughters in
elementary school.
Several factors affect [...]

Continue reading about Mom, May I Get My Ears Pierced?

Mama J on October 9th, 2008

Several readers who know me wanted the history of Mama J.  You
asked, I’m telling.
My daughter Amy’s middle name begins with a J.  Somewhere along
the way, when Amy was about three, I started calling her Amy J for a
nickname.  She actually didn’t like it at first, but by the time she was
between four and five she [...]

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